April Fools? Or not?

Yesterday (or rather, during the night) I announced the ending of SNW. Now I need fans, friends and foes to read this carefully: Everything I wrote in my previous post is true. Everything about the broken hardware/electronics, everything about the stress, everything about the community hate and everything about the site issues. All those things are true. Everything except the bit about closing the site. Yes people, that bit was an April Fools joke. Might be a harsh one, but that bit could have been true as well.

As I was typing my news post yesterday, Cheetah walked by, he saw the title and it scared him a lot. You see. He actually heard and saw me the past months. He knows how stressed I've been, and how I was this close to actually shutting down SNW. He kept me from closing SNW several times. So, you have him to thank for the fact that SNW is still up and running. Because all the issues are real. And I have real stress because of it.

Nonetheless though, it is absolutely true that I would miss SNW and the community too much if I'd close the doors. Yes, I'm talking about the same community with the haters. Because that same community also has a large group of lovely people. I met more than a handful of awesome people through the community. More people than I can count. And that's worth so much more than those haters I mentioned.

• Like I mentioned, the problems are real. The computers are broken and we are working on getting the repaired. I don't know when but I hope as soon as possible. Not only am I bored out of my mind now that I can't game. I also can't work anymore and that's something I can't live with.
• The site issues (the fact that it's slow and the weird bugs and errors) are not made up either. They do prevent me from posting anything right now. People are working on resolving those bugs. But it can take some time and even my lovely programmer boyfriend is unable to fix all the issues. At least not right away. I hate not being able to post properly. It's very frustrating, so please bare with us while we work on these things.
• The stress I have from all the problems is real too. Some time ago I discovered I am losing a lot of hair and that's mainly due to medication and stress. Most of you probably don't know it. But I'm chronically ill, have several diseases and life is challenging at times, to say the least. I'm not a sad person because of it and I don't need anyone to pity me. But it's only fair to tell the truth. These illnesses make life harder and I realize more and more that I need to put myself first, before anything else, also meaning before SNW.
• The community hate is real as well. I won't let others bully me away. But there are sites in the community who try their best to bully me and some of my friends, mostly because they are jealous. I refuse to mention their names, because I am better than that. I don't need to bring them down on my site. Karma will catch up with them later, I'm sure.

I'm very sorry I scared a lot of good friends and fans. I felt really bad seeing sad people on our Facebook and Twitter. I needed to let out my issues though and this was certainly a good way. No, SNW is not closing its doors. But sometimes I wonder why I bother to continue. And I hope after reading the previous post and this one, that you understand why I've had my doubts.

I'm also a little annoyed that some people could only look at the date and go: April Fools. Forget the date for a moment. Then read the previous post again, and read the above. And then think again. It was this close to being reality. Are these reasons not bad enough? Especially the stress I've had and still have are a constant reason for me to think: should I just stop all this? Of course every time I think this I'm reminded by lovely people that I shouldn't quit. That they love the site and the articles. Some also love the downloads. And then there is my other half, the lovely Cheetah, who says I will regret this decision if I would do it, that this is my hobby (so what will be left if I quit this?) and he tells me that the issues eventually will go away. I only chose a rotten date to tell you about the issues, I'll give you that. So yeah let's hope the issues will go away soon. At least now you know the issues I'm dealing with and that it might take some time for me to be back. If all goes according to plan they should probably pick up my computer this or next week? Not sure. I'll post about it on our Facebook page and Twitter account.

Again I'm so sorry for the people that were truly shocked. Thanks for reading my rants though. And I just hope you will understand why I chose to do a radical thing like this. Believe me when I say that I am done with April Fools for the next 10 years.